The Funeral
by Eets
Summary: A Drabble based on this head canon idea I saw on tumblr: "4. Remus chose to sit alone at Lily and James's funeral. He had an empty chair on either side of him. One for Peter and one for Sirius." oneshot.


**A/N**: All of the beautiful Potterverse belongs to Ms. JK Rowling, not me!

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><p>The weather, at least, was appropriate for the day, Remus thought to himself as he gazed at the clouds rolling over the deserted hillside. They were dark, angry and ominous looking. They rippled and shifted; their bruised purple tinge hinted at an approaching storm.<p>

He walked slowly across the empty fields, waves of nausea engulfing his body with every unwilling step he took. To reach his destination, that lonely chapel down in rural Devon, would be to make the horrors of the past month real.

Everywhere around him people seemed to be celebrating, forgetting the tragedies and the casualties that had occurred over the past years. Everywhere people were whispering the name "Harry Potter". And every time he heard it, his heart broke once more.

Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived and the luckiest boy alive. Harry Potter, the son of the two greatest people Remus had ever known. Of course he would be an exceptional, one of a kind child. Anyone who had known them was acutely aware of this.

He could not bring himself to even think their names.

Harry Potter, the boy who would be lonely and forever deprived of knowing those brilliant people. People, who should have been there to see him grow, feel the unimaginable pride of parents and know him as no one else ever would.

Remus tried to fill his mind with poor Harry's misfortune in order prevent him from letting the self-pity consume him. But surely, it was better to never have known them than to have them snatched away from you so cruelly?

The werewolf scolded himself immediately for this thought. Dumbledore had forbidden any person of magical blood to attempt to find and contact Harry but once he turned eleven he'd have to go to Hogwarts. Remus would see him then, tell him all about his parents.

Lily and James Potter. As he reached the chapel, there was no containing the memories; they burst forward into the very forefront of his mind, a powerful and unstoppable river of emotion.

Her parents were already sitting in the front row, as was Petunia and her unsympathetic husband. Remus noted that Petunia's shoulders were shaking like his, only just holding back the sobs. The other pews were filled with acquaintances from their school year, not many of the close ones though. They were all dead.

Lupin scanned the rows almost hungrily, seeking out one greasy black head. He felt his body relax when he realised Snape was not present. Of course not, like that coward would have the audacity to carry on with his pretence of ever having cared for either of them.

The front row across the aisle from Lily's family was empty. Remus realised with a sickening feeling in the pit of his stomach that it was reserved for him. He made his way there as slowly as he possibly could; every head in the room turned to look at him and analyse his face. He tried to keep his gaze as blank and even as possible.

When he neared the line of empty chairs, he realised with a jolt that the coffins were already there, waiting by the pulpit. Twin, cherry wood caskets containing the corpses of his very best friends. There had been many occasions when Remus Lupin had felt alone, an outcast from society all his life. But never had he felt so isolated than in that moment.

He turned to look towards Mr and Mrs Evans, knowing that social convention dictated that he should pass some kind words to them. Remus looked at them; he did not know of any kind words, not at a time like this. He opened his mouth to speak but all he could manage was a small choking sounds.

The looks on their faces conveyed that they understood. They could only choke and stutter too.

Finally, it was time to take his seat. Time to watch them get lowered into the ground, finally realise that they were gone and that their bright and hopeful lives had been extinguished.

Emmeline Vance (a girl he and Lily had always been friendly with, a fellow study-holic) motioned that he could sit with her where she sat on a crowded pew. He appreciated the gesture. He felt slightly less alone at the sight of her wan face.

But he shook his head and took his place on the white painted wooden seats.

He could not stop shaking.

Peter's chair sat to his left, Sirius's to his right. Remus sat between the two empty places: the last Marauder standing.

A surge of pity filled his heart as he gazed to his left, a dizzying sense of confusion towards the man absent from his right-hand side.

He was grateful that there had been no trial. Remus did not think he could speak out against his best friend.

He now thought of them as two separate men: the Sirius of Hogwarts, of friendliness and loyalty and Sirius, the deranged madman who had murdered his two best friends, not to mention a street full of innocents.

Everyone said they hated him. Remus couldn't help thinking that Sirius couldn't have been plotting his betrayal since First Year. The laughter and love the Marauders had shared was genuine. Those school days, at least, were real and could remain untainted.

The service had ended, a blur to the werewolf crying silently in the front row. His stomach felt so hollow and numb, a feeling he couldn't imagine ever leaving him. However there had been a time when he couldn't have imagined James Potter, Peter Pettigrew or Sirius Black leaving him. But they had.

Remus Lupin would never be whole again. He was forever doomed to be a quarter of the man he used to be. He placed his hands on the achingly empty seats on either side of him, and wept.

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><p><strong><span>AN:** Thanks for reading, please take the time to spare a few words in a review - it takes no time at all!

Note to anyone reading this (especially The Grass is Always Greener readers) you can always find writing updates on my tumblr - you don't need an account to view/ask me questions so I'm always contactable. Check it out, URL on my profile :))

Thanks again! You review= totally awesome 3

Elle x


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